This and That

Yesterday, while the weather was still somewhat springlike, I stepped outside with my old TtV (Through the Viewfinder) rig and snapped a few pics. The first is dried oregano and well, the second is the Wonderdog. ;-)

I got my copy of Smoke Illusions and over all, I'm pleased. If only I could hire a few proof editors but no major mistakes that I see.

The link to the Blurb bookstore is in the sidebar.

I may have to scrape together my pennies and see if I can afford to get a new off-cord flash adapter so I can experiment more with smoke photography.

Have a beautiful weekend.

Idol Chatter

George is adapting to his new home beautifully. I do believe more red is appearing. He really is a gorgeous fish.

Lucky or not, I did not see much of Idol last night. Dinner followed by Lost took the evening. What I did see was quite surprising. Adam and Allison were both quite good. Adam proved why he is a finalist. I was disappointed in Danny’s performance. Perhaps it’s me but I didn’t hear where he took the advice of Smokey Robinson. Just my distracted observation as I was flipping between Idol and Lost.

In trying to decide which book to read in my ever growing stack, I have grown to appreciate a well written opening paragraph. One that not only grabs your attention but has you wanting to know more about the character and the story about to unfold. It makes me rethink much of what I’ve written in the past. Oh, I know a great opening doesn’t necessarily mean a great book but it certainly helps.

I have fallen behind on writing a story a week and taking a photo a day. I don’t see myself catching up with the stories any time soon. And unless the calendar suddenly changes, I won’t have 365 photos for the year 2009 without cheating. That’s my life, though. Not perfect, often behind but still plugging along, trying my best.

*Now playing: You're Not Leaving Me by Martina McBride - Shine

"You can’t really believe that I would give in so easily."

Or maybe you did.

*Now playing: Wrong by Depeche Mode - Sounds of the Universe

Do I Dazzle You?

As quoted from Twilight ~Edward.

Is February over yet? I am so over this winter and ready for spring. Hoping that with spring’s renewal will come a renewal for me and this blog.

Spring

Spring Flowers

youthful fresh bright

a dash of color

delights the eye

summer nears

tulips wilt, flowers fade

ever graceful ©bonnie underwood (blu) 2008.

I am a doodler of words and that's all that I am.

*Now Playing: Wanted by Holly Brook - Holly Brook EP

The Wild

When I was younger, I had this vision of myself setting out to disappear into the great unknown. I'd settle in some small mountain town and live for awhile and move on before getting too close. Sometimes, love would find me. Maybe it's all those Harlequin Romance books I read but taking off on my own and telling no one where I was held much fascination. I read the book referenced by the CD (love the CD, too) and while his journey came to a tragic end, I never really saw an end. Or maybe I did and that's why I chose the person I married. Yes, we've moved all over this country but somehow, it hasn't been the same. I keep talking about moving to North Dakota and am met with jeers of, nobody lives in North Dakota and to which I reply, exactly.

Part of me knows this desire to move to the wilds is the part that wants to runaway from the past. To runaway from the future. To runaway from life as it has become. Why face the problems of today, tomorrow or the past if you can just up and leave when they catch up with you? Not to discount a journey that takes you to far away places, especially those journeys that bring you face to face with you. The you that you've been hiding from. The you that seeks to find happiness and inner peace. Journeys have their purpose and I know that someday, I will explore the wilds of this country and who knows, maybe I'll find the ghost of myself. But when I do this, I will not do so in a selfish manner. As I've matured and faced many of the parts of me that wanted to runaway, I've matured and dare I say it, become more responsible.

Plus, I'll have to make my journey in an RV with my very own bathroom or at the very least, my car and hotel rooms. You know, that whole safe toilet thing. ;)

*Now Playing: Society by Eddie Vedder - Music for the Motion Picture Into the Wild

Summmertime

"We forfeit three-fourths of ourselves to be like other people." - Arthur Schopenhauer

Standout from the crowd. Be yourself, whichever quirky, wacky, intelligent, beautiful self that happens to be today.

And on another note, for those that are pessimistic, after today we begin the slow crawl into darkness as each day becomes shorter. Embrace the sunshine and summertime of today. Kick back with a tall cold one, run your toes through the sand... have a beautiful Summer Day!! Even if it's cloudy and threatening rain and storms (like here).

One Year

One year ago I started my blogger blog. I've had some form of a website for many, many years but this marks one year on blogger. Even with it's ups and downs through the migration process, I like the ease of blogging anywhere and not writing all my own code for each page created.

The lilies are blooming as are the basswood blossoms. This time of year, the air is filled with the heavenly scent of angels. The basswood tree is calling me but with my missing Lensbaby filters, I'm not sure how much I'll be able to do. Maybe this year, I'll just walk beneath their heavily laden branches and enjoy the perfumed air.

Happy Father's Day

A slow day around these parts. I've spent the past few days searching for all my close-up filters for my Lensbaby and lost them all somewhere. I was hoping I left them at my parents' home but they've been unable to locate them. That'll teach me to stack them all together and keep them in one place. Just in time for a few summer flower photos, too.

Hope all the fathers out there are having a great day.

Woodland Sprites

Or a walk in the woods and playing with flare and my TtV. Spring is slowly making its way to my world and I couldn't be more ready.

TGIF TtV

Not much to say, I cut my thumb badly and taking it easy using it. Have a great weekend, stay dry and warm.

Stormy Seas

It's been a stormy night with little sleep as The Wonderdog has decided these last few years to be afraid of storms. So a 3am wake-up call and potty break followed by several booms and lots of whimpering from under my bed.

Even after the stormiest night with waves crashing all around, if you wait a few hours, the the night gives way to calm seas. Life is full of those moments just as the roller coasters in the distance have their ups and downs, the storms come and go. Sometimes, the storms are made worse by my own mind and letting go brings the smooth waters back. Smooth until next time.

Hope you have smooth seas to navigate. We have more storms on the way to bring more flash flooding before the snow falls. I'll ride this wave just as I've ridden many in the past.

Dusk

Sipping some white wine, watching the sun sink on the horizon, leaving a subdued color along the horizon, does it get much better? A touch of spring fever has entered my bloodstream. I do realize that winter is not over yet but with a couple of warmer days and sunshine sure can do wonders for the mood. I am much better this evening. Still have issues weighing on my mind but I know I have the ability and the foundation here at home to overcome my obstacles.

Sleep well, dear friends and remember to find the happiness in your darkest moments. Happiness in Suffering.

Lonely

Sometimes, one can feel so alone in this world. This world made smaller by the Internet. This world of instant communication, cell phones and all those other electronic means. What's missing? The face to face human interaction that we all crave? Are we losing a part of what it is to be human? I've no answers this morning.

I do know that at times, I feel alone even in a crowd. Everybody all around is hurrying from place to place, phone pressed to their ear or scrolling a Blackberry for the latest, even the mister. Or as me, iPod playing some tunes through earphones. Sometimes, life seems to send me into a reflective place. A place where I only have more questions and no answers. A place where I question not only the decisions I've made in the past but also the future. Nothing I can do to change the past except for how I feel about it. I suppose if I embrace the past, its hold could be made positive. The future, a future that can never be certain but a future that I can affect. I just have to decide whether this path has been the right path and maybe I need to look for a new direction but I get lost in my backyard. Anybody have a spare GPS that I could borrow?

My time here is up for now. Have a beautiful day and take time for some Starbucks.

Ring Ring

It's funny how the past has a way of calling, reaching far into the future and affecting the person we are today. I truly did think that I'd forgiven, breathed out and moved on and for the most part, I have. I don't have any expectations anymore. Life has moved on but so often, I see in my own relationships, a withdrawal on my part, even to the point of words that are unkind. This withdrawal is deep seeded going back to those younger years. Those years of hurting to try and keep yourself from being hurt. Those years of not really feeling worthy of love. Even knowing that the words and withdrawal can become a vicious cycle. A cycle that helps to keep me feeling less than worthy.

The past, not to be forgotten as it shaped the person I am today. The good, the bad and the ugly. Would I change it? No, I don't think I would. It's made me who I am today. To a large extent, I know that I've made better choices for my own daughter.

One thing that has changed, electronic communication. I'm typing this from my bed, still all snugly with sleepy eyes using my notebook computer. A notebook computer with very short battery life remaining but still a new means of communicating. But a means that sometimes must be unplugged so as to connect with myself.....

And with that, breathe in—breathe out—move on.
Have a beautiful day, friends.

Lighthouse Light

Those who know me, know that when in need of some comfort, I often find myself at a lighthouse and it doesn't matter the weather. I had a lot on my mind when a distant memory surfaced. It's a memory that I cannot share here, not with the family still with us, but it's one that helped to possible shed some light on things in my life. No, it's nothing truly serious or criminal, just those emotions that surface at times and the relationship with my mother.

Grosse Point Lighthouse, in Evanston, Illinois on a cold winter's day. It was wicked cold with the wind coming off the frozen lake but so beautiful. The lighting in winter is always special. Any excuse to make this trip, I take it.

Have a beautiful day, friends.

Latté

Yesterday, after a day of cleaning and purging stuff from my life, I treated myself to a foamy, homemade latté. I do like foam on my latté. It is the simple things in life that can bring the most joy. Those simple things are often not related to the stuff we have cluttering our life.

After a trip to the gym today, I'll be back to the long process of uncluttering my life. It is far easier to unclutter the external portions. It's the internal workings that have me in a much more reflective state.

*The espresso machine has been used, thus it can stay! ;)
**It seems spell checker doesn't like the word unclutter(ed).

Seal of Approval

It's January and winter is making it's chilly presence known. Flurries are floating around out my window, much like a snow globe. The wind stirring them ever so gently. A chill is in the air. Perfect for snuggling under a warm blanket, sipping hot chocolate and watching the flames dance. Even if the flames are only in a candle. A candle that fills the air with a warm glow and pleasant scent.
I'm not complaining (even though I don't like the freezing cold) as it is January and winter is upon us. Complaining just makes the winter last longer. Nope, I am embracing what is good about winter.

With that, it's time for me to snuggle a bit and watch that flame dance while drinking not hot chocolate but steaming coffee. Have a beautiful day, people. :)

Woof

Playing with Christmas ornaments and TtV.

Known Unknowns

" There are known knowns. These are things we know that we know. There are known unkowns. That is to say, there are things we know we don't know. But, there are also unknown unknowns. These are things we don't know we don't know." Donald Rumsfeld.

This was perhaps my favorite quote by Donald Rumsfeld. I chuckle everytime I read this quote.

This I know, today the President announced that Rumsfeld is stepping down. He had a way with words.

As this in not a political blog, I return you to your regularly scheduled programming....

What were you expecting?